On being forged into a warrior mom

If I could summarize our journey from Hell to HOPEISM, it would be in my faith, which I call HOPEISM. It has been my weapon of choice to get me through each battle I have had to fight in my mission to win our war called life with autism and seizures. Vaccine injury to be more specific. It would also be in committing to heart, soul, & mind the words and motto's from Forged, NDCQ, the Lone Survivor, and Levi Lusko in his book, "Through the Eyes of a Lion." I will be forever grateful to the inspiration, encouragement, and mental fortitude found through all of them collectively. Because of that, I am not allowing this tragedy of vaccine injury that has come into our lives to be an obstacle to being used by God. I am instead turning it into an opportunity to be used like never before!

This blog is dedicated to Brandon. His life has been forged by difficulty, obstacles, & all too often because of seizures - pain, blood, broken teeth, & broken bones. Yet through all that he has shown such fortitude. The bravery, strength, & resilience of a true warrior. He taught me that having strength through adversity means that even if you lose every battle, like the Lone Survivor, you never quit fighting until you win the war. That in the words of "NDCQ," you keep "dreaming," keep "daring," & keep "doing." As Team Guppy has yet to be able to escape vaccine injury, we have no choice but to as Levi Lusko writes, "Run toward the Roar." God has indeed given us such incredible power in enduring such impossible pain.

Some days the HOPEISM in that simply takes my breath away.

September 7, 2011

Choosing to listen & believe the voice of truth.

This is a picture I took with my camera phone standing in the street in front of my house. There are wildfires burning around us, and though we are not in any immediate danger, we can still see and smell the smoke from those areas that are in danger.

I've felt hurt by some things lately, today.  And for a fraction of an instant it seems, I let those trivial, humanly emotions allow satan to whisper what a fool I am, was, and no doubt will be again.  I allowed myself to hear those evil whispers telling me I'll never measure up.  I'll always be misunderstood.  But then this picture was painted right there in front of my house as the "voice of truth" reminding me just the opposite.  Of God's glory, and how it shines through any darkness, through any smoky, cloudy, haze. Through any trial, complication, bad news, betrayal, blazing fires or billowing smoke. Reminding me that God's Faith, Hope, and Love roars. And if we would allow it to, it will roar so loud that it drowns out satan's whispers before you ever have to hear them.

It reminds me of lyrics from the song by Casting Crowns, "The Voice of Truth".

But the waves are calling out my name
And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
Time and time again. "Boy, you'll never win!"
"You'll never win!"

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, "Do not be afraid!"
The voice of truth says, "This is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

And as this day ends and I look at this picture, listen to that song, and type these words, I know these things for certain:

I will make mistakes.
I will be misunderstood.
I will feel mocked.

But above all, I will always be captivated, amazed, and majestically mesmerized by my Messiah and how His Mercy and crazy love for me has always shone through any malady or mess up I have faced.

And in the end, that is all that really matters...that's all that has ever mattered.

Choosing to listen and believe the voice of truth, 


Click here to listen to "The Voice of Truth" by Casting Crowns

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