On being forged into a warrior mom
If I could summarize our journey from Hell to HOPEISM, it would be in my faith, which I call HOPEISM. It has been my weapon of choice to get me through each battle I have had to fight in my mission to win our war called life with autism and seizures. Vaccine injury to be more specific. It would also be in committing to heart, soul, & mind the words and motto's from Forged, NDCQ, the Lone Survivor, and Levi Lusko in his book, "Through the Eyes of a Lion." I will be forever grateful to the inspiration, encouragement, and mental fortitude found through all of them collectively. Because of that, I am not allowing this tragedy of vaccine injury that has come into our lives to be an obstacle to being used by God. I am instead turning it into an opportunity to be used like never before!
This blog is dedicated to Brandon. His life has been forged by difficulty, obstacles, & all too often because of seizures - pain, blood, broken teeth, & broken bones. Yet through all that he has shown such fortitude. The bravery, strength, & resilience of a true warrior. He taught me that having strength through adversity means that even if you lose every battle, like the Lone Survivor, you never quit fighting until you win the war. That in the words of "NDCQ," you keep "dreaming," keep "daring," & keep "doing." As Team Guppy has yet to be able to escape vaccine injury, we have no choice but to as Levi Lusko writes, "Run toward the Roar." God has indeed given us such incredible power in enduring such impossible pain.
Some days the HOPEISM in that simply takes my breath away.
October 1, 2010
Between the sacred and mundane...
I think the first time I saw the below translation for what it means, I just stared at the words across the top of her blog for what seemed like an hour....
Between the Sacred and Mundane
Something about those words captivated me, and I still don't know quite why.
I told Laura I was sure I would steal that title and use it as the title of one of my own blog entries one day.
I guess this is the day.
Maybe the reason I was so drawn to that name was/is, because the simplicity is so profound in how it describes the title of my own blog: "Life with Autism".
Definately from the diagnosis to this day in my life with autism, I have experienced both the sacred and mundane, as well as the whole spectrum in between.
Sacred in the pure holiness of being a part of my son's life. My son who has autism, seizures, and a host of challenges along with that.
I don't mean to for an instant compare my son to the holiness of the God. But I very much mean to imply that I know that I am in the presence of purity and innocent perfection in that son.
And it has been a very sacred experience.
So very many times in this journey I've experienced that sacredness, but each time much like my son's seizures, is like the very first.
And it amazes me.
Amazes me in how quickly I forget just how amazing God and His sacredness, is.
So much so, that it is like the first time each time.
Lately that has been proven again in this round of trials and other issues unrelated to autism.
The seizures, going to the ER, the hospital stay, back home more seizures, more calls, more questions.... Family situations that are too big for us but not too big for God.....
All of it bringing me once again to that sacred place where my Savior dwells.
Where there is no autism, no seizures, no trials.
Where there is only perfection.
That place far, far, far, from the mundane where my problems and my imperfections lie in comparison.
That place far from being fed up with the futility of fretting over things I cannot change.
That place far from the insignificance I feel in comparison to those with careers and credits after their name.
That place far from having security in my savings account, or in anything tangible the world has to offer.
Sometimes I forget that.
That sacred place where God dwells and what it means in my life.
Sometimes I get stuck there, between the sacredness of God and mundaneness I allow myself to make of things.
(I mean really, how mundane is your life when your facebook status shares how excited you were to get more of your son's pee in the cup than on your feet, face, or body?)
I do though, like to think my life is humorously mundane.
That's better than just plain mundane, right?
Even as I type these rambling thoughts, I am again struck by that title:
Between the sacred and mundane...
I like that.
It gives this scarlet sister some hope!
To each and every day make the mundane, sacred.
Take who the world calls insignificant, and do all that you can to show the world their significance.
Take who the world throws away as trash, and polish them as a jewel.
Use your hands, feet, voice, gifts, words, - to serve.
Even if you must do the same thing day in and day out, do it with the sacredness and servanthood as Jesus did when he washed with his own holy hands, the filthiest of feets.
Do it with the compassion of Christ as he healed the lepers of the world.
Even if you must fight a losing battle, fight it with the preserverance of the man who didn't let even his own death on the cross stop him.
I guess I was remembering more the mundane and not the sacred the other day on the way to taking Brandon to the medical center. Again.
There's a place going downtown, where all 6 lanes sorta go up a 'hill' and on the horizon looking forward, what catches your attention is a huge billboard that simply says "God Listens".
As I was driving I saw that and glaced at all the lanes of cars beside and before me, all going the same direction, all filled with people who have their own trials and challenges.
I wondered what they were thinking.
If they were simply driving in the mundane traffic, going to a mundane job, just to mundanely do it all over again in the morning.
If they knew when they too see that sign, that God indeed, does listen!
That God can take their mundane, and make it sacred.
I wondered if there was any sacred in their life.
I was reminded of the sacredness in my own life.
I just can't imagine if it wasn't there to keep the mundaneness from becoming manic madness.
To keep me grounded, focused, & purposeful as I live life with autism between the sacred and mundane.
Humorously mundane that is.
I gotta have the humor....
Thank you Laura....