On being forged into a warrior mom

If I could summarize our journey from Hell to HOPEISM, it would be in my faith, which I call HOPEISM. It has been my weapon of choice to get me through each battle I have had to fight in my mission to win our war called life with autism and seizures. Vaccine injury to be more specific. It would also be in committing to heart, soul, & mind the words and motto's from Forged, NDCQ, the Lone Survivor, and Levi Lusko in his book, "Through the Eyes of a Lion." I will be forever grateful to the inspiration, encouragement, and mental fortitude found through all of them collectively. Because of that, I am not allowing this tragedy of vaccine injury that has come into our lives to be an obstacle to being used by God. I am instead turning it into an opportunity to be used like never before!

This blog is dedicated to Brandon. His life has been forged by difficulty, obstacles, & all too often because of seizures - pain, blood, broken teeth, & broken bones. Yet through all that he has shown such fortitude. The bravery, strength, & resilience of a true warrior. He taught me that having strength through adversity means that even if you lose every battle, like the Lone Survivor, you never quit fighting until you win the war. That in the words of "NDCQ," you keep "dreaming," keep "daring," & keep "doing." As Team Guppy has yet to be able to escape vaccine injury, we have no choice but to as Levi Lusko writes, "Run toward the Roar." God has indeed given us such incredible power in enduring such impossible pain.

Some days the HOPEISM in that simply takes my breath away.

July 22, 2010

On the wild side....

I took this picture because for me it brought a smile to my face as I so related to it.

It seemed to represent so many struggles in my life as a person, a Christian, and a parent.

Which am I?

The perfectly mowed, manicured, conformist; or the imperfect, wild, non-conformist?

As a Christian do you have to be one or the other, or can you truly be both?

I laughed as I walked... 

Asking God his thoughts.

I think he laughed harder.

He knows my heart. 

I couldn't pretend to be the mowed side of that divide even if I tried!

He knows that while I'm totally unequivocally irrepressibly and insanely devoted to Him, I'm still a human child sometimes walking the wild side of life.

Even as it's thundering outside back home as I type this, God giggles knowing that while others may scoff at a storm, I savor it....

Sometimes I feel like the flowers you can't see. The ones that were mowed over because of someone's idea that grass all one length looks better, is more acceptable.

Is it?

I don't know.

But I do know that as I walked around that path, the mowed side never changed. 

It seemed stagnant, never-changing.

In places, burned out from having been chopped by the blade too severely!

But the wild side did change. 

It moved, it flowed, it had wildflowers that while still weeds, were beautiful. 

When we take a legalistic approach to our Christianity, thinking someone can't be as good a Christian as us because they live their life a bit differently, on the wild side we would say; we lose sight of the freedom that very Christianity is supposed to bring.

For me that means not the freedom to purposely sin, but the freedom to be who God made me to be...

A wild, wacky, worshipful, weed-filled, wonderful woman!

Who could perhaps learn to walk a wee bit closer to the divide...

           (quit laughing God!)

~ ~ ~

By Michelle M. Guppy

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